Clare is 4!

I know I'm a bit late but I wasn't going to let the fact that Clare turned four last week pass.  FOUR!!!  And for a little girl, that is a huge deal.  So big in fact that on her birthday she informed me that she was now too old to use her booster seat and would also no longer need assistance getting onto the toilet seat.  I didn't realize turning four also met a huge leap in stature but you know...mom's can be clueless about that stuff.  Since her birthday was on a Tuesday we were going to wait until Saturday to have a party which I loved because it was just our little family surrounding her with love on that special day.  As the birthday girl she got to pick the menu for breakfast, dinner and a special treat after that.  That meant plain pancakes in the morning and macaroni and cheese (or as we call it "cheesy noodles") for dinner and for dessert, vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup and sprinkles.  Sage had picked out a present for her containing several craft projects for Clare to work on so she got to open that present in the morning.  She was so thrilled about with it and had all the crafts finished by the time Sage got home from school.  It was so cute how she showed Sage all she had done and to see Sage so happy that Clare really enjoyed her gift.  She had to wait until after dinner to get her gifts from us and the first one she opened was one Brent had found for her and something we thought for sure she was going to be so excited for.  She had been asking for a kite since last fall so he found this really sweet butterfly kite for her.  She looked at for all of two seconds with barely an expression before moving on to the next gift.  Turned out that this was the same amount of excitement she gave to all her guest's gifts at her party but the good news was that once everyone was gone she was pouring over every gift, showing us how coolthey were and saying things like "isn't that a great gift?"  The other gift we gave her was her own Leapster.  She and Sage have always been okay with sharing Sage's leapster but we figured she would enjoy her own and it would help on road trips if they both had one.  It's been a pretty big deal for her to have her own leapster and I guess it's been a reminder to me to make sure Clare has opportunities to have her own identity rather than running around in Sage's shadow all the time.  She's so good about always getting the hand-me-downs from Sage and, at least at this age, to her those things are brand new and just for her which is such a blessing that she has that sweet attitude, but I don't want to take it for granted either.
Anyway, Saturday was the party.  Up until the week of her party she was changing her mind on what the theme would be.  First she wanted a Tangled party, then a Hello Kitty party, then just a cat theme, then back to Hello Kitty, then Dora...etc.  Finally I said, "Clare, how about not having a theme and instead we'll just have a really fun party with lots of games and a yummy cake?"  She was all for that and told us that she wanted a white cake with strawberries in the middle and the only game she insisted on was limbo.  Oh, and she wanted the butterfly pinata we had seen at Target.  Done.  So we invited her nearest cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents over on a beautiful Saturday morning for what we hoped would be a super fun day.  We started out with a limbo contest that Clare ended up winning (she's a smart one, that kid!) then moved onto the pinata and finally a fishing game in which the kids had a fishing pole with a big hook that they sent over a sheet where Brent and I would send back either a great catch (toys and candy) or a not so good one (stinky socks, boots, etc.).  After lunch was eaten, the candles on the cake blown and all the pretty presents had been torn open, we sat around and visited while the kids played.  The park next to us was having a winter fun weekend in which there was cross-country skiing, skating and of course, sledding down the big dike across the street.  We watched a competition they had from our front window of homemade box sleds--some very impressively decorated I might add--racing down the hill.  Then we all put on our winter gear and took to the hill ourselves--even the grandparents!  Other than Clare and her cousin Kason both suffering from being run over by out of control sledders (both recovered fine I'm pleased to say) it was a really fun time.  I don't think I will ever forget the sight of Grandma Jane, Grandpa Buck, Papa and Nana all having their turns sledding down the hill.  To be honest, that made me more nervous than watching my own kids go down!  If you head over to my sister-in-law Ester's blog at lifeisbeautiful-esse.blogspot.com, you can see more pictures and some videos too. 
So now my youngest is four and reminds me that she is older everyday--not just in words but in personality too.  She is such a fun kid to get to be a mom to and makes each day interesting and with laughter sprinkled throughout.  Her name, Clare Ilisa, means "clear" and "illuminating" and she has remained true to those words.  Thoughts, words and actions are done with purpose and intention and though she is little, her big personality lights up the darkest days.  We are so proud of our Clare Bear and very thankful that God chose us to be her parents. 

A Fun Craft

Recently we read a book to the girls called "My Dog Is As Smelly As Dirty Socks" by Hanoch Piven.  It's about a girl who is given an assignment from her teacher to draw a picture of her family.  What she turned in pleased the teacher but the girl was not quite satisfied with it as she felt her stick figures did not capture the personalities of her family members.  So, using found objects to specifically show her family she makes new portraits that tell us so much more.  Inspired by this, the girls put together their own portraits today with some help from me on how these objects define their personality and I wanted to document what they came up with.

Sage is...

as silly as ducks...

as bright as a light bulb...

as happy as cotton balls...

as thorough as a comb...

as lovely as flowers...

and as artsy as beads.

Clare is...

filled with a big heart...

as curious as a butterfly...

as lovely as a flower...

as fun as beads...

as helpful as a bow...

and as bright as a jewel.

And both carry strings that are tied to my heart.

My Gift

Brent was sitting with the girls one night last week, discussing all the fun things they will be doing in Morris once we move there.  Brent told Clare that she would get to go to school and do lots of fun things there while Mom will be all alone at home.  After thinking that over a bit, Clare's sweet little bottom lip started shaking as she asked "But what if Mom gets lonely?  Who will she play with?"  Brent called me into the room at that point and told me what had just been talked about while Clare sat there with big tears going down her cheeks.  I scooped her up in my arms and had to work through my own tears while trying to reassure her that I'll be fine while she's away.  The little peanut hugged me with her whole body and cried and cried, refusing for quite a while to be put down.  It's funny how when we are apart from our kids we spend so much time wondering how they are doing and if they're okay.  I guess I never considered that they may have the same thoughts about us.  While I certainly don't want to her to worry so much about me, it was still such a touching moment to see this little girl, just shy of four years old, have such a moment of empathy for someone else.  Have you ever seen someone receive an unexpected gift--like a loved one making a surprise appearance after being deployed for a long time--and standing there as a witness you are overwhelmed with emotion in that moment and so happy for the person who received that wonderful gift.  That's what it was like for me while I held Clare and cried along with her.  To have that gift of empathy and thoughtfulness is something that will be a blessing to so many people in her life and also to her as well.  As a Mom we are constantly serving and giving which is what we were made to do and don't think twice about...well, most of the time.  :)  That moment with her was so unexpected and sweet that a thousand "thank you's" would have never come close to what she did for my heart that night.

Has Anyone Seen the Snow Lately?

I'm just as puzzled as the rest of us up here in the supposed tundra at where the snow is.  I don't think I can ever remember a December, let alone Christmas, without snow in Minnesota.  (I know I'm actually living in ND right now but I'm sort of in denial about it)  Well, you certainly won't hear me complaining about this strange weather--it makes for easy conversations with people I don't know.
As usual this season breeds much activity and I'm trying to just enjoy it all but it does leave me with little energy to document what all we've been up to.

Quick highlights:  Thanksgiving was a really nice time with Brent's family and  none of the pictures I took really do any justice to the fun day it was...sorry.  The next weekend we went to a Christmas party hosted by the hospital Brent will be working for once we make our permanent move to Morris this summer.  It was a really great night which was a bit surprising for the both of us since we went to it not really knowing anyone.  But everyone was so welcoming and fun to talk with that both Brent and I left even more excited for our future there.  We got back in time for my Mom and I to walk around homes in Grand Forks that were open to tour and see the Christmas decorations set by professionals.  Some people like to see art displayed in art galleries, Mom and I like to study the beauty in different styles of architecture and home decor...or maybe some people would say we just like to snoop in other people's homes.  :)  More Christmas parties, then down to Fargo last Sunday to drop off Brent at the airport to go to Texas for a week long workshop.  After we said goodbye, I took the girls to the church Brent and I went to when we were first married.  The girls were uncharacteristically excited to go to children's church (which they had a blast at) while I enjoyed an amazing sermon that literally brought me to tears.  After grabbing lunch and dropping Clare off at Grandpa Buck's for a nap, Sage and I went to the play "Little Women" in which Grandma Jane was playing Aunt March (and in my opinion the best part of the play).   I will always have an image of Sage getting such a kick out of her Grandma coming on stage in big hoop skirts and silly hats and acting so differently from how she knows her. 
We survived a week without Brent and are now happily reunited.  Somehow in the midst of all this we've managed to do all our Christmas decorating and we seem to be only one or two gifts shy of being done with the shopping.  Let me make this clear, I have not described all this activity with any intention of boasting but instead as reminder to ourselves of what it was we were actually doing when down the road we're trying to remember why it was that December seemed so crazy and flew by so fast!  Most importantly I want to remember that this has been a really fun month and so worth the chaos and many days of feeling worn to the bone!

I'll end with some pictures of the gingerbread house the girls and I decorated with Brent overseeing via Skype while he was in Texas.  This is actually the second gingerbread house we decorated.  The first one I bought on clearance and was such a disaster in trying to put it together that in a moment of fiery frustration I threw it away and told my startled girls I'd go buy them a new one...not one of my finest moments for sure!  The other pictures are of Clare in her Christmas program at church.  She seemed to like singing but participation in song actions were minimal.  :)  Sage sat with us and cheered her on (very loudly).  Clare has gone back and forth  telling us she was either scared or not scared at all.  I'm not convinced that either of our girls will have the performance bug I had as a child but I guess time will tell.

After the disaster of the first gingerbread house, I was just as ecstatic as they were!

Even the enthusiasm of the boy next to her wasn't enough to motivate Clare into doing the actions.  That's my girl, just say "no" to peer pressure!

My heart overflows...

I came across a show last night on the history channel about how Thanksgiving came to be.  Of course much of it was about the pilgrims in Plymouth who I've always been fascinated with--so much so that I talked my mom into going there this last summer for a week.  Fabulous trip that I'd do again in a heartbeat but I'm getting off the subject...right, Thanksgiving.  While I'm watching this show a historian starts explaining that the tradition of this holiday actually predates the pilgrims and goes all the way back to a day celebrated by Europeans every year in the fall in which families would go to church for the whole day and spend it there thanking God for all His blessings that year.  They actually fasted the whole day since it was spent in church.  I found it interesting (and a bit humorous) how this holiday has evolved.  Now instead of a united day of abstaining from food so we can focus on expressing our heart's gratitude, we come together as a nation in stuffing our mouths with more food than any other day of the year while Grandma forces everyone at the table to say at least one thing we're grateful for!
Regardless of how this day is celebrated, it's always good to remember what it is we're thankful for and hopefully we all work at counting our blessings more days than not.  And there is an endless list in my heart of all that I'm grateful for.  Family, love, good friends, health, a warm home...as the list goes on a person can't help but knowing who it is they are saying "thank you" to.  There's an old song that you've probably heard that goes "Praise God from whom all blessings flow..." and that's what I hope and pray His ears hear tomorrow.  Pure and simple praises of thanksgiving.

And Now She's Six

I'm not sure how this happened so fast but Sage, who came into this world a teeny, tiny 5 1/2 lb baby girl, is now a tall, blond haired six year old.  Excuse while I run to get the tissue box...
Birthday's are so exciting for children and I guess I never thought of how fun they were going to be for us, the parents, to throw.  We'd been contemplating what kind of party to have for months and many ideas were tossed around but the one that stuck was an art party.  We would have a time for painting in which every kid would get a small canvas to paint on.  Her cake was also meant to inspire creativity in each of the guests by giving them all mini frosted cakes and tons of candy to decorate them with.  The rest of the time would be for playing and just hanging out.  The best part of this party was that since we've moved closer to home, she would get to have seven cousins, five aunts and uncles and five grandparents in attendance.  Yes, it was loud and at times a bit overwhelming but we've been looking forward to getting to have these moments with family for quite awhile now and are savoring it so completely!  We had Sage's party on the 12th which was actually my oldest brother's birthday which Ehren so graciously shared with us.  We made his favorite tater tot hotdish for him among the plethora of other food that was served and if you've ever had it, you know it's a basic meat, cream of mushroom and vegetable mixture with tater tots on top.  Brent and I have never actually made it but it was quite simple to do except that we were also making a similar vegetable dish, everybody's favorite green bean casserole, that has french onions on the top.  When Brent went to pull the green bean dish out to put the onions on, he realized that he had put the tater tots on the wrong dish.  We had a good laugh over this and Brent just cleverly scraped the tots off the green beans and put the over the meat mixture and the dish was saved.  You really couldn't tell the difference because, let's face it, it's only meat and a few different canned vegetables that make them different. 
Sage loved her party and the gifts were all just so perfect for her.  She hates being the center of attention so having to open gifts in front of everyone and even hearing everybody sing "happy birthday" to her is probably her least favorite parts of her birthday parties.  But every gift given was so thoughtful and just right for her that she has not been seen without either wearing a gift or playing with a gift since.  Yes, Grandma Jane, even the soccer girls have seen a lot of play time  :)
Surprisingly, turning six was a little hard for Sage.  She kept telling us that she wanted to stay five because five was her favorite even after we tried to convince that being six was just as great.  I'm not really sure why the fixture to five but I'm sure she'll be able to accept this new numeral as time passes.  Can you imagine what turning 40 is going to do to her? 
I can't say enough how proud we are of this little girl.  She's a funny, smart, thoughtful, beautiful, sensitive and caring girl and one of the two greatest gifts that God has given to Brent and myself. 

You would think he's giving a special performance from the looks of this picture but don't believe it, he has no idea what he's doing!  This was a guitar that Grandma Bev gave Sage.  She's notorious for giving random gifts and this was certainly one of them.  Sage has been adamant about not taking guitar lessons and yet we hear her strumming away whenever we're out of the room.

Grandma Jane, Grandma Bev and...who is that?  Oh yes, that's Nana using Clare to block the camera.  It's a sad fact that 75% of pictures taken of Nana have only shown bits and pieces of her body and rarely ever do you see her beautiful face.  

Cake decorating time.  More candy and frosting were eaten than actual cake.  Oh well, they seemed to enjoy it at least.

Almost all of my favorite kids in the whole world.  We're only missing cousins Sarah and Adam who live out in NY.

Sage loves her sleep and this big day called for a little nap while the kids were watching a movie.  She wasn't the only exhausted one, Brent and I were in bed a little after 8pm that night!

As typical of me, I got so caught up in the actual painting time at the party that I completely forgot to take any pictures.  So last night I took this with the girls hold their pieces of art.  Oh, they are so proud!

Ramblings

Every time I go to pick up Sage I always get a chuckle at the scene just before the bell rings.  Dozens of parents stand in a semi-circle around the schools entrances, staring at the door in quiet patience for their kids to emerge.  I always wonder if anyone else ever thinks to themselves how ridiculous we must look.  Very few chat with each other and impressively, in my opinion, very few use those minutes to chat on their phone or text someone.  We're all just waiting for that first glimpse of our child's face.  I'm curious as to how this scene will change now that the temperature is steadily dropping!
Poor little Clare has had an awful case of croup this week.  Her breathing was so raspy that even Brent got pretty worried and it takes a lot for him to get to that point.  She stays so sweet through it though, telling us in her cracked, whispered voice that she thinks she's feeling better.  I don't know where she got that sweet attitude from because neither Brent or myself are pleasant people when we're sick.  Today was definitely a better day and to add to it, it started snowing for the first time this season while she was sleeping.  Looking out the window was like watching a snow globe settle after a vigorous shaking.  When I picked up Clare from her nap, I told her I had a surprise for her and brought to the window, watching her face the whole time.  She just got a sleepy smile and quietly said "It's snowing!  That means it's almost winter.  That means it is going to get colder."  Goodness, she has no idea how right she is!
We're getting ready for Sage's sixth birthday this Friday and party on the next day.  I'm emotional about her birthday as usual but looking forward to getting to celebrate it with almost all of her cousins.  Pictures and details are soon to come!

Lovely Leaves

They have this wonderful system of leaf collecting here in Grand Forks.  Twice in the month of October, city workers come with a massive vacuum hose attached to a dump truck and suck up the leaf piles you have made for them on your berm.  Can I just say that up until this year I never knew there was such a word, berm, for that little patch of grass between the sidewalk and street.  Uffda, I'm such a country girl!  Anyway, I have a weird obsession with raking leaves and refuse to use anything with a motor when I collect them.  Just a rake, gloves and the much appreciated muscles God gave me.  I even made Brent promise not to steal my thunder and take this job from me.  So, imagine the giddy world I've been in lately with last night's final rake making it a total of five hours spent raking this fall!  The first rake was just for fun so that I could make a huge pile for the girls to play in.  We even situated their plastic slide so they could land right in the middle of all the deliciously crunchy leaves.  They took turns hiding a treasure in the leaves while the other had to find it and of course, the pile was heaped up over and over only to be crushed again as flying little bodies found a cushion for their landings. 
I knew the magic leaf truck would be making its final pass in the next day or two so last night I worked for an hour to pile the trees most recent purges.  I like to make mounds throughout the yard and then use a giant bag for loading the mound and pulling it to the growing wall of leaves on our berm.  The girls were busy coloring and playing inside but after awhile they were curious as to what I was up to.  I had two piles left to load and drag and Sage and Clare were eager to help.  They scooped up armfuls of leaves and packed them down so enthusiastically that half of what they put in flew out again.  Once the bag was full I asked to see their muscles to determine if they were strong enough to pull the bag themselves.  They passed the inspection and grabbed hold of a handle as I grabbed hold of Clare's hand and pulled her as she sometimes tends to veer off course.  :)  Their whole bodies leaned forward to pull that big bag all the way to to its final destination and there the girls worked together to dump its contents, giggling as the leaves dribbled around them.  We continued this process until we reached the last mound.  The girls faces dropped as I explained that we would not be playing in the leaves anymore this fall since the magic vacuum truck would be taking them all away and just as I was about to start scooping up those last leaves I stopped and said, "You know, I think this pile really wants some kids to jump into it first before we take it away."  Well, you can imagine what happened next and I will have the memory of their delighted faces and giant belly flops for always. 
This morning Clare and I had just gotten back from dropping Sage off at school when I heard a rumbling in the front yard.  We ran to the window, threw the curtain back and gasped when we saw...the magic vacuum truck.  In less than a minute it sucked up all my hard work, not leaving a trace behind, then moved on to the next house.  It's a reminder that this season is quickly ending and soon snow piles will be keeping the girls entertained while I am once again giddy doing my other weird obsession...SNOW SHOVELING!

Courtesies

This week I went to a mom's group that our church holds once a month.  They have volunteers who watch our kids (God bless them!) while about a dozen of us listen to the speaker, usually one of the pastor's wives, for about 40 minutes and then we break into groups of 3 or four to have a casual discussion while to we try to apply the message to our own lives.  I've tried the other mom's group out there and while I certainly had fun, I find for myself that this smaller (and quieter) group of women who enjoy digging into God's word to guide them as mothers and wives all the while remaining light enough to enjoy some good laughter together, recharges me so much more.
Anyway, the real topic of this post is the handout that was given at our last meeting.  Being the first meeting of this year, it was a sort of the expectations of our conduct being laid out.  All week I've been rereading this and not because I'm nervous about breaking one of the rules but because what it says is so simple and yet so very profound in how we treat our relationships today.  I hope Andrea doesn't mind but I just had to document it somehow for my girls.  Sage and Clare, someday when you read this I hope (really hope) that you can truthfully say that I held up these "courtesies" in my relationship with you, your Dad and everyone else, and that this will always be the desire of your heart to treat others in this a way--even when such honor is not returned.  I know that I will fail at this more than once and when I do, I pray God or you will show me the fault I hold and I promise I will say I'm sorry and ask for your forgiveness.  What teaches people the most is our own actions towards them and when the actions do not coincide with the words of our mouth, lessons will go unheard and never applied.  I can never make you choose to live any certain way but for better or worse, I know my actions will remain an example to you for the rest of your life.  With that thought, I know I need to pray A LOT! 

With some editing (italics being mine), I give you--

Mom Time Courtesies

  At the heart of any courtesy is putting the interest of others above your own, or "doing unto others as you would have them do unto you."  -Mathew 7:12

    

     1.   Be as consistent as you can.  We know that things come up and when they do, just let others

           know your change of plans.  Work at making your yes' be yes and your no's be no.

     2.   Be as prompt as possible.  Girls, I will work at breaking a generational habit of being late by

           showing up when you expect me and getting your where you need to be when you need to be,

           remembering what it feels like to walk late into a quiet room full of  people.  As you get older,

           more responsibility will fall on you to get yourself ready, but right now at your age, it is

           only my fault if you are late for something.

     

     3.   Be trustworthy.  Please treat information shared in discussion and prayer requests as

           confidential unless a person gives you permission. 

           "Honor one another above yourselves"   Romans 12:10

     4.   Listen.  Often in discussion people only want to be heard.  Be a good listener and only give

           advice if asked.  Be encouraging. 

               a.  "My dear brothers, take note of this:  Everyone should be quick to listen, [and] slow to 

                    speak..."   James 1:19a

               b.  "He who answers before listening - that is his folly and his shame."  Provers 18:13

               c.  "In humility consider others more important than yourselves"  Phillipians 2:3

               d.  "...stop passing judgment on one another."  Romans 14:13

               e.  "Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the

                    Head, that is, Christ."  Ephesians 4:15

     5.  Be real.  Be willing to be open with your life.  Openness requires transparency and

          authenticity.  Remember, God is not looking for perfect wives or mama's; He is looking for

          those who know they are not perfect.

     6.  Work for Unity.  Unity is a priority and a goal. 

               a.  "Be humble and gentle.  Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's

                    faults because of your love.  Always keep yourselves united in the Holy Spirit, and bind

                    yourselves together with peace.  We are all one body, we have the same Spirit, and we

                    have all been called to the same glorious future."  Ephesians 4:2-4

     7.  Don't Slander.  Although we encourage all to honestly share challenges and struggles during

          discussion and prayer times.  Please do so in a way that protects the reputation of your

          husbands and children.  This is not a place to recklessly vent complaints.  Take great care when

          your share about or pray for your husband and/or children (and friends) so as not to slander

          them.

               a.  "Do not slander one another"  James 4:11

I don't know how to end this post other than to say I love you girls and I'm so proud to be your mama.  More than you'll ever know.

Be Flexible Thursday

Thursday has become our here, there and everywhere day.  It starts out with dropping Sage off at school and then at 9:30am I take Clare to gymnastics.  I usually try and knock off some errands in that 40 minute window.  After lunch and Clare's nap, we pick Sage up from school, run home for a quick snack, a change of clothes and then whisk her off to her hour long gymnastic class at 4pm.  We meet Brent back at home a little after 5pm and then head off to our home group bible study (kids included) that goes until 7:30ish.  I always feel exhausted by the end of this day but it's worth it to me to be able to contain so much in one day so that the rest of the week is much more relaxed and freed up. 

I took the camera to both of the girl's gymnastic classes yesterday.  They go to Red River Valley Gymnastic which has an amazing facility and they both seem to really enjoy it.  The funny thing is that Clare's class is the only one going at that time and usually there is only about five kids in it (although yesterday there were just two) while Sage's class time has many classes going at the same time and yesterday I counted up to 70 kids and I know there was even more than that.  However, they've really mastered handling that many kids and the student to teacher ratio is still low enough that you never feel the sense of chaos.  It's incredibly impressive and I think I should maybe start taking some notes! It's fascinating to me that both of the girls have a strong desire to take gymnastics when I was so much in love with it myself when I was a kid.  We're really opposed to pushing the girls into being involved in only the sports and activities that we love or did as children because we like to encourage their individuality and interests in order to help them gain confidence in themselves and in the choices they make.  So before they are signed up for any class, we'll go over all the possible options out there, from swimming, to soccer, to t-ball to ballet.  Only one activity can be chosen and so far, this is what they really want to do.  I'm going to just enjoy it while it lasts and maybe brush up on some old skills in the meantime.  :)

One thing I want to mention about these pictures is that I wasn't allowed to use a flash in the gym which made it difficult to get a crisp image--especially during Sage's class so my apologies to you if you're forced to squint.



The lady in the pictures with Clare is Miss Jenna and she is her teacher and often Sage's as well. 
She seems to know the name of every kid that comes into the building and every kid knows hers and loves her.  She will demonstrate for them one time a long circuit of skills she wants them to work on and at the end she'll always say "Okay, go play." and I'm always shocked when I see the kids going through everything she just asked of them and remembering how they were suppose to do it all the while having a fun time.  I cannot say enough great things about her.



This is a balancing exercise where Sage is playing catch with another girl while on a balance beam.  They play this for awhile until the teacher tell them to switch and then they'll go to the next beam for a different exercise.

Noise Pollution

Last month we got a scathing letter from an anonymous group saying it represented our neighborhood's interests in preventing noise pollution and that we had a toxic problem in our backyard:  our dog, Miles.  It went on and on about how he is disturbing the peace and that his noises are "illegal" and that it is in our best interest to have him professionally trained to stop all forms of barking because they would hate to see this issue be taken to court where we may be forced to have Mile's vocal chords cut.  You would understand our shock in the contents of our letter if you knew our dog.  He does bark, that is when he sees someone in uniform or sometimes when other dogs walk by.  He is not barking all day long and if he does I just tap on the window and he'll stop.  The one annoying behavior to us is that he whines if he sees us outside while he's in his kennel but none of this would constitute the accusations and threats in the letter we received.  The best part is that an address or phone number of the person/persons is nowhere to be found on this letter, keeping us from even getting a chance to discuss with them the issues they are having with our dog.  So we've assumed the person must be one of our next door neighbors and to let them know we've heard their frustration loud and clear, if Miles ever barks or whines while Brent is at home, he yells outside in a very loud voice, "Miles!  Stop barking or they'll cut your vocal chords!"  We always get a little chuckle from this.
Last night Clare was pretty wound up and being a bit of a stinker when tucking her into bed and I ended up saying goodnight to her and going downstairs all the while hearing her pretending to cry in protest.  After a bit I heard footsteps, then a door open and then Sage yelling at the top of her voice, "Clare! You better be quiet or they're going to cut your vocal chords!"  I went to the stairs and asked "What did you just say?"  and she just burst out laughing.  I couldn't believe she had just said that and I started laughing so hard.  However, not a peep could be heard from Clare's room.

Recap

Here's a quick summary of where we're all at now in the time that's passed since the last post.  I'm going to make this super quick as minimize potential boredom. 
Our biggest change is that Brent finished is military time last June which meant we would be moving from Omaha to Grand Forks, ND for one year while he does an OB fellowship.  He was so excited the day he got out that he did a cartwheel in front of everyone at a formal dinner for the family medicine residency program that night.  I guess that all I can say is that Brent is still Brent and I still love him more everyday.  :) It was bittersweet to leave Omaha after seven years of living and growing our family there.  We really loved living in Nebraska but the thought of moving back up north and being close to our families was so exciting.  Last summer we spent time in seven small towns in MN in an effort to figure out which one was the place to finally settle.  God gave us the peace and joy we were hoping for the minute we got to Morris, MN.  Brent has signed with them and we will be moving there once his fellowship is over.  This time here will give Brent the skills to do c-sections which will be a great asset for his practice in Morris.  I am in the meantime really enjoying Grand Forks and was really surprised to find out what a neat place this little city is.  People here live very active and outdoor lifestyles (I'm guessing because the frigid winter forces them to spend so much time indoors!) and I'm constantly running into people overflowing with genuine kindness.  Seriously, this is a great place, who knew?!  I'm slowly working on becoming certified as a doula and will hopefully complete that in the time we're here.  I love the work and feel like it's something God made me specifically for this kind of work.  Right now it's a bit tricky to really invest myself in it with Brent's odd hours and also the age of the girls but I'm thinking that as soon as they are both in school I will start working on getting more clients and also do childbirth education. 
As for what's been going on with our girls, I'll start with our youngest and little spitfire, Clare.  She is now three going on eight.  Potty training is well past us and we are enjoying a diaper free house immensely!  Clare is pure delight to us with her sweet little (and at times loud) voice.  In fact, I'm quite certain that she feels any silence should be filled and will dutifully take that responsibility upon herself.  All day long she is taking notes on the world around her and trying to put it all together in a way that makes sense to her and the best part is that she'll try and share with you what she's figuring out.  I'm going to have to start writing them on this blog because it's so stinkin' cute.  When she's not chattering away, she's singing songs she knows or else has made up.  The made up ones are my favorite and while they have the potential to never end, they usually contain a theme and sometimes even plots.  Last night was one with an impressive vocal range of notes and was about the moon needing to be around at night but alas, it went missing and, from what I could tell, she was heartbroken.  No worries though, the moon returned and all the land was happy again.  Clare is loving her gymnastics class and is completely unaware of what a peanut she still is and never let's it hold her back from trying to do anything the big kids do.  Since we have this floater year here we decided to keep her home this year and just have her go to one year of preschool instead of doing two like Sage did.  Instead I'm working with her a few days a week in some preschool books and making a point of having our own "field trips" every once in awhile.  Both her and I are really enjoying it so far but I must say that this is going to be the farthest we go in the world of homeschooling.  While I am certain that God calls some families into homeschooling, I know that He has called us to send our kids to public schools.  :) 
Sage finished her last year in preschool and it was amazing to see the difference in her work when compared to the first.  The changes that we've gone through lately have had more of an impact on her then Clare simply because she's older but she's also done really well with it too.  The hardest part by far has been having to leave her two closest friends she has known since she was six months old.  Hard as parents to make her go through this too but we know at the same time that it can be a really good thing as well.  She was able to get past her fears of kindergarten and started the first day so excited and has loved it so far.  She seems to be doing well to but you wouldn't know it from the information she gives us.  I know she gets tired of all the questions we ask her about school everyday but for all our effort all we can gets are tidbits about what her class is working on, that gym was awesome and what she had for lunch.  What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall in her classroom!  The other day her teacher, Mrs. Rood, walked up to me as I was dropping her off and said "She is so sweet!" and went on to say some other nice things but that is one of the things I love the most about Sage is how kind and gentle she treats others.  For certain there are exceptions when it comes to her sister, but Sage has been blessed with a tender heart that often shows itself in wanting to take care of others.  She'll cover you with a blanket when you want to rest and is always wanting to help put the dishes away or set the table and pour our milk.  Her big struggle is letting go of things like clothes that she has grown out of or baby toys she once used.  With God's guidance, we're working on that.  Sage still loves swimming and did a lot of it this summer.  On a trip with Brent's family to Charleston, she swam every day for hours--one day going none stop from 7am to 2pm.  But when we gave her the choice between continuing swimming lessons through the fall or taking gymnastics, she surprised us with wanting to do gymnastics.  I have a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with seeing Clare in her new leotards. 
I totally skimmed over all that went on in the last year, missing things like selling our house in one day, traveling so much this summer that I counted packing a suitcase 10 times in three months, running in a half marathon, not to mention the many great places we went to int the Omaha area our last year there (I'll share them with you if you're ever planning a trip) but this will have to do because days are passing and there are so many new things to discover and share.  All I can say is that our blessing are so great and we have so much to be thankful for. 
"God has been faithful, He will be again."  ~Sara Groves

A Great Day

I know I said I was going to catch up on what we've been up to over the last year but yesterday was such a neat day that it must be noted first.

To be honest, I woke up dreading the day and had a shameful, grumpy attitude to go along with it because Brent had to be at work at 7am and would be working all day and night. Ugh. So right away, while rubbing the sleep from my eye, I tell God I'm sorry for having this bad attitude and also asked if He would stay next to us throughout the day and keep us in His perfect will because life is so much more happier there. The girls and I had our breakfast and slowly woke ourselves up and before long it's time to get ready for church. This is a long process with two parents let alone one parent who is as indecisive as her five year old on what to wear. It was raining out as we pulled up late to church and normally I'd be a bit crabby at this point but I think I was doing okay. We saw an odd sight as we were walking in of a couple guys directing a driver up on to some blocks where they were, apparently, about to do an oil change for him--right in front of the church doors. Next, we're greeted just inside the church by two of the pastors dressed in bright orange t-shirts and jeans as we say "hello" in our proper (and well thought out, I might add) Sunday bests. Pastor Pat gives me a funny look and says, "Were you here last Sunday?" I tell him no and that we had been out of town. I know it's not necessary but I can't help but always feeling like I should explain church absences--especially to the pastor. He said that this their annual Sunday where they cancel services and tell the congregation the week before "don't just go to church, BE the church." They place an ad in the paper with a number people can call if they have work that volunteers can do for them. I got so excited as I'm listening to him because I just love these kind of service acts so I asked him if there is any project that would be appropriate for me to bring the girls along with so they can help too. He gave me the address to an 80 year old woman's house who needs help with her yard work and washing windows. We rushed home to change our clothes, grabbed our gardening gloves and headed to Ms. Lucile's house. There were several people working there already and they directed us to a couple apple trees that needed picking. My heart jumped inside because this is something the girls and I did a lot in Omaha at local apple orchards and we've missed it this fall because there are few apple trees that can grow in this cold climate and orchards are nowhere to be found. It felt like I were being blessed as much as Lucile because of this amazing opportunity to teach the girls about what it means to show love to others around us through selfless acts of service. They were so thrilled that she was going to have all those apples to make apple pie with! We also worked together in washing down windows on the outside of the house. Right before we left, Clare spotted some flowers and said she wanted to pick them for Ms. Lucile so we snipped a few day lilies and Clare brought them into to give to her. Lucile was so sweet and I found out that she use to be a teacher so I would imagine it meant all the more to visit with Clare and have a good chat.

We drove home exhausted, hungry and so happy. I had to chuckle as I thought about the dressed up state we started in compared to the mud smeared mess we were now. Work is always so much more satisfying if you can come away from it good and dirty.

As we sat down to eat, I asked to Sage if I could check her loose teeth. Two bottom teeth have been quite loose lately and the night before, one of them had looked like it could come out at any minute. I gasped when I saw in its place a little gaping hole. I asked her and asked her if she remembered the tooth coming out but she clearly didn't. I checked everywhere but there was no tooth to be found. After reassuring her that we could write a letter to the toothfairy explaining what happened and she would understand, we called Brent so she could share her big news. It was a big deal as this was the first tooth to come out on its own accord. The year before, her top two teeth had to be pulled out after one was fractured from a run in with Clare's head. No harm was done to Clare's head in case you were wondering.

Later, I took them to the mall to have a little girls shopping time and while we were taking some silly pictures in one of those photo booths, Sage started shouting "Mom! My tooth fell out!" Sure enough, there in her hand was the other loose tooth. We went to visit Brent at the hospital after that and she was so proud to show him her little baby tooth. I won't mention the little squabble that flared up when sister Clare wanted to be the one to carry the tooth around.

That night as I was tucking Sage in I remembered our prayer from the night before and asked Sage if she did to. She didn't and so I said "Remember you were really nervous about it hurting when the tooth fell out and also what if it bled? So we asked God to help the tooth come out tomorrow on its own without any pain or bleeding." I asked her if it had hurt when the tooth came out. No. Did it bleed? No. She got a big smile and said "Mom, we can ask God for whatever we want!" Oh boy. In the end she thanked God for helping the tooth come out and asked for Him to help the new teeth come in fast, not too fast...just kind of slow. :) Then I went to Clare's room and she prayed "Thank you God for all the pretty flowers that you made special for me. Thank you God and thank YOU Jesus. Amen"

It was a great day.

It's Been Awhile

I'm trying this again. I just sat here for the last half hour, changing and tweaking the template to make this space feel fresh and new. I feel like I'm just starting out on some major spring cleaning and, let's face it, this place hasn't been cleaned for almost two years. This blog was started with the intentions of capturing glimpses of our every day lives so that the girls would have sort of a treasure of memories to look back on and read when they are older. As everyone knows, life can get busy and when things became crazier this blog was the first to be dropped. It was a welcomed break but I'm ready to get going again on this project. My little family has gone through quite of few changes and new experiences and more are on the way (no Mom, I'm not pregnant!). I just want to savor and enjoy every experience God is leading us through and, just as the Israelites did in the Old Testament, document the many blessings we have to be thankful for so that when we hit the bumps and hard places is life's road we will be able to look back and remind ourselves how God has not and will not leave us on this journey. I'll try and do a quick (or as quick as possible) catch up tomorrow and we'll go from there. See ya!

Here We Go Again

Today brought me face to face once again with my least favorite subject on parenting: potty training. This morning Clare dragged Sage's old potty chair into the middle of the room and said "Potty? I go potty?" Really? Already? Because she's got another week of being only one year old so I figure I should have at least six more months available to make lame excuses of why we haven't started down that road. But my sweet, little darling's demands are getting louder and more insistent and since I definitely do not want to direct anything negative towards that chair I smile and sweetly say, "Okay, let's try!" with as much excitement as I can muster. Thus began the morning of "Potty!" and the subsequent running to the little white varmint so I can strip off her diaper and then watch her sit for two seconds and then jump up and yell "All done!" In case you were wondering, not one of those trips were actually successful but then, I wasn't expecting them to be. Her excitement was catchy though and when she woke up from her nap with the same subject on her mind, I made a risky decision by stripping her down to bum, plopping the detestable seat in front of the tv and plopped "Elmo's Potty Time" into the dvd player. I figure if anyone can get the idea through her head, it should be Elmo. She sat for awhile before the thrill of being diaper-less got to her. There were scoots around the house and dances in front of the seat but every so often she'd come back for a sit. I noticed that she was starting to stuff toys into the vestibule for germs and as I was explaining to her that this was not for toys, only --- and ----, I noticed her socks were wet. I must say this didn't surprise me or disappoint me in the least. I know I jumped the gun a bit but curiosity had gotten the best of me. I started to look for the scene of the crime and when I finally found it I had to laugh out loud. The little stinker had stood right on top of an Elmo book and drenched it. And not just any Elmo book but a book with an Elmo puppet built right into the middle of it. She literally peed on Elmo! I guess Elmo did have sort of influence on her!

Dear Sage

It's taken me a bit to sit down and write you a birthday letter but at least my reason for being late is a good one in that we have been busy hosting guests, celebrating Thanksgiving, decking the house for Christmas and celebrating snow days together. Now that the dust has settled I wanted to take the time to share with you the memories of this last year so you'll always have a glimpse at what you were like at three.

Last year we sent Dad off to "the desert" and headed up north to stay with Nana and Papa for three months and during that time we celebrated your third birthday up there with all the grandparents. A week later you were in the pediatric ICU after accidentally swallowing one of Grandma's medications. To date that was the scariest time of my life. But you were fine and made the most of your visit there by requesting popsicle after popsicle from the kind nurses. We made it through the 30 below winter in Minnesota to come back to Omaha in January and enjoy a week with Daddy on his leave from deployment. You and Clare started going back to Tina's for two day's a week so I could get a little break which you were totally on board for as there were mornings you were practically shoving me out her door. In June we waited anxiously at the airport for Daddy's plane to arrive and bring back the man we had missed so much. It took a few months for you to fully accept him back into the fold--I think a big struggle for you was that you felt like you were betraying me in letting yourself enjoy him and allowing him to do many of the little things that only Mom had been doing for the last year. You worked your way through that though and now Daddy is something of a rock star in our home and everyday when he comes home from work and walks through the door you and Clare morph into a cheering squad complete with screams and big jumps. I'm pretty sure your Dad is just as excited to see you too. This was a year of firsts for you; first swimming lessons, dance class and first year of preschool. With each of these events you have blossomed more and more and are growing into your own little person, becoming brave enough to have a voice in the world around you.

I must say that three was much, MUCH better than two. Oh, there were moments (and still are) when every ounce of my self restraint was tested in resisting the urge to lock you in your room for a week, but the difference between two and three was that you wanted to understand so badly the reasons for the limits we put around you and once they sunk in you gladly followed them and usually would preach them to us for a week and also try your hardest to instill them into Clare.

This was the year of discovery in all things pink and princess. Your poor Dad is daily stifling feelings of nauseousness. There isn't a day that goes by in which we don't find you doing some kind of funky fairy dance--which led us to enrolling you in ballet classes. We can't get enough of watching you dance in class. There are curtains over the windows so that the kids aren't distracted by seeing their parents but we found a window outside that we can peek into. It's a bit cold but so worth it. You have a smile on your face the entire class and you do pretty well at following the teacher but every once in a while the dance bug hits you and you break out into your own dance complete with jumps, spins and wiggles.

There is a soft spot in your heart for animals and the major theme to your play at home is gathering various stuffed animals in the house and tucking them into bed. Your self therapy is still acted out here in that one animal is usually struggling in one of the disciplines that you yourself are trying to master at that time. There are never less than three animals that you are taking care of which makes me wonder at the number of kids you will have someday! This play is always done exclusively and a sharp objection is usually issued should someone try to join you.

Your two best friends are still Sara and Abby and it's because of them that we sent you to preschool this year--a year earlier than planned. This will be the only time when you will be in the same class as them and we felt that adapting to school would be much easier for you if you could do it with your friends there. So far this has proven true. Again, your overexcited parents are curious about what you do at school and we're often told "No more questions!" but you seem to be loving school and your teachers. I'm just amazed at how much you've changed in the few months you've been at school and the confidence you've gained from it.

This year for your birthday party you requested, of course, a princess party. So we invited Sara and Abby to go with you to get mini-manicures and then we headed to our house where the dining room had been transformed into a castle complete with a dining table just the perfect size for little princesses. You were beyond excited about the decor, so much so that the minute Sara and Abby arrived you started yelling "Sara! Abby! We have decorations! Come see our decorations!" I had a lot of fun making a castle cake for you and the effort it took was well worth it when you told me it was the best cake EVER.

In one year you have grown into this curious preschooler with definite tastes and preferences. There is a sensitivity about you that surprises us at times. Only the happy parts are watched when we play one of your movies, all the other parts that include hurt feelings, sadness, mean villains or scary sea lions that are trying to catch a cute penguin with dancing feet (name that movie) are skipped. One night I spent a half hour answering your questions of why Mordecai would try to hurt queen Ester and her family after watching the Veggie Tales version of the story. The next half hour was spent reassuring you that there was no such thing as an island of perpetual tickling. To best explain this side of you I have one last story to share and it's by far my favorite. One day we decided to make cookies for Dad to take with him on his hunting trip. As you were on about your third spoonful of cookie dough, I said "Sage, do you know what these cookies are called? Monster cookies." Your whole body froze and a panicked look came over your face. With a convinced voice you told me "No! They are NOT monster cookies. I don't like monster cookies." "Yes Sage," I said, "they are monster cookies and I think you do like them judging by the amount of cookie dough you've eaten." Again she insisted "No, they are not monster cookies...they are happy monster cookies." I chuckled and agreed with you that they must be, in fact, happy monster cookies. Later we were in the car and I was telling the story to your Dad of how the new name of the cookies had come to be and when I finished he asked you "Did you make me happy monster cookies?" You immediately yelled from the back "NO! They are not monster cookies!" Dad said "I know, they're happy monster cookies, right?" to which you replied "No! They are not happy monster cookies...they're Jesus cookies." That's my girl!

Celebrating Fall....Uh, I Mean Winter...I Mean...

What a surprise to wake up to a few inches of snow last Saturday! In Minnesota this would not be such a shock but in Nebraska? Really?! Sage's reaction was the typical excitement from a kid her age and the expected question "Can we go play in it?" She handled my reply of "Sweetheart, we don't play in the snow at 7 in the morning. Let's go make Mommy's coffee first," quite well actually. Clare on the other hand got huge eyes and stared out the window in complete shock...and then started crying. When we finally did make it outside she was determined to not step foot out the door but once I plopped her in the snow she was hooked. We built this snowman before their afternoon naps and by the time they woke up the snowman's head had fallen off from all the melting. Have no fear though, with my super mom powers I was able to convince them that a head falling off there darling snowman was funny. The snow has since melted away to reveal the still bright green grass underneath and next Monday they are predicting temperatures in the 70's and we will go back to celebrating the fall foliage and picking pumpkins. But for us this little foretaste of winter has brought some excitement for all the fun that's to be had when the temperature drops. Maybe unpredictable weather can sometimes be a good thing.

Time with Family

Last weekend was such a treat for us when my brother, Ehren, and his wife, Ester, came with their children to visit us. More visitors arrived Monday after Ehren and Ester left, when Brent's dad, Bruce, and stepmom, Jane, stopped by for a couple days on one of their "circle tours" to see their kids and grandchildren. With our anniversary thrown in the midst of that too, it was four very fun filled days and it has taken me this long to regain the energy I need to sit down and think my way through this post!

We always have so much fun when Ehren and Ester visit. They are so layed back and yet are always up to trying something new. We mixed things up this time by nixing the usual zoo trip and instead went to Fontenelle Forest and meandered on the boardwalk through the forest while on the lookout for dinosaurs on exhibit right now. I'm not sure what the older kids liked better, the dinosaurs or racing strollers...with little kids in them. Ah yes, the lovely walk on a quaint wooden trail... the surrounding views of streams and deep cliffs covered in foliage...the lurching of your body over the side rail to avoid being run down by a crazy red head pushing a stroller with two little girls laughing their heads off as they race in break neck speeds on to the next innocent bystander. From the looks they were receiving, I thought it best to look innocent and put a good 20-100 feet behind me and the racing stroller.

The best part of being with Ehren and Ester (with any of my brother's families for that matter) is watching the kids play. When I was in high school and Ester was our exchange student, I was horrified by the budding romance between them. I think my opinion went something like "My college age brother with a girl who is a year younger than me? Eeeewwww, grosss!" Fortunately, nobody listened to me and during college I came to my senses and realized that if Ehren married Ester, I would get to have one of my dearest and closest friends be a part of all the major and minor events in life and I would get to be a part of hers. I remember being in my dorm room in college while she was visiting and saying to her, "Our kids will be cousins!" I think about that every time I'm enjoying these precious children play.

These are pictures taken in the forest and also the only time the camera was taken out during both visits. It's a problem I have when I'm enjoying the company so much that I forget all about capturing the moment.


The making of a band featuring Kade, Anika and Sage. Special performance of interpretive dance by Ester.



Love this picture. Kason was so tired and this was the only place that was good enough for him to be content.



Ehren did his best to carry some of the weight for Ester but even this would not do.



I want Brent to build this tree house. It was so Swiss Family Robinson like.

Ehren and Ester headed home Monday and Bruce and Jane pulled into town that afternoon. Since it was our anniversary, Bruce and Jane were sweet enough to stay with the girls that night so Brent and I could go out and celebrate. We ate really, really good food but maybe a bit too much of it because the next morning we were still full and had to ask Bruce and Jane if they would be willing to cancel plans to eat out that night so that our stomachs would be able to return to their normal size. Fortunately, they were okay with that. Bruce spent the morning at the zoo with Sage while Jane, Clare and I supported the local economy. Poor Brent had to work. The evening was topped off with a light meal...okay, kind of light until we got to dessert and had a divine blueberry coffee cake that Jane had made. She said she was going to bring some slices with them to have on the road but heh, heh, heh, they forgot and we got to eat the rest ourselves. :) Again, a very nice visit and the girls absolutely loved getting to spend time with their grandparents.

Both Brent and I felt so guilty for all the food we indulged in that we both ran over six miles the next day and have done several other workouts since. It was soooo worth it though.

Cuddle time

There is this perfect moment right before Clare's bedtime when she is just tired enough that if you gather her into your lap she snuggle in, sticks a thumb in her mouth while the other hand reaches back to gently pinch an ear. We had such a moment the other night while all four of us were outside playing around. Brent and Sage were off to catch crickets and beetles while Clare and I cuddled on our two person swing. We swayed in the breeze with my arms wrapped around her, feeling her body completely relax in the rocking motion. There is a silent agreement between the two of us that we could stay in this swing forever. I remember having these same moments with Sage when she was that age. It's the feeling of being in as perfect a moment as you can get this side of Heaven. In that moment I try and memorize every detail of my surroundings, the feeling of holding her so tightly, the overwhelming amount of love I have for her right then so that I can remember it for the rest of my life. I want to remember for the inevitable time to come when she is too busy or too big to cuddle with her mother or maybe for those times when she's not quite as endearing :) These moments are at the top of my list as one of my favorite things in being a mom.



As we sat I had this thought: is this what God feels when we completely surrender to him? When we quit running around, distracted and in non-stop motion and take a moment to sit in his lap? When we stop trying to do everything "all by myself" and allow His arms to surround us as we allow ourselves to completely relax in His care? Does He hold us in His arms, relishing in the love He has for us? Then I began to wonder when the last time was that I totally, absolutely chose to sit quietly in His presence and felt His peace be enough and everything to me. I say it and think it all the time that I need to stop worrying or trying to control things that are beyond me and just hand them over to God and trust...sounds good but honestly, I usually don't hand it all over. I hold just enough in my hands to feel like I'm not about to free fall into unknown territory. Instead of letting my body go limp and breathing in the knowledge of His love and care for me, I keep my back straight while I sit with Him, watching for any sudden movement that would compel me to stand up and leave that comfortable spot. I'm thankful for these moments when He shows me a new glimpse of His love and I resounded that night, as Clare and I swayed in contented bliss, to make more time to sit with my Father and let Him hold me for as long as it takes for me to not want to be anywhere else.