I'm tired. Don't worry, I'm not going to sit hear and boo-hoo to you. I just need to tell everyone that going solo with the girls day after day is exhausting. The good news is that for the last week Clare has slept through the night (thank you Lord!) and then one of them usually wakes up at about 6am. However, I'm beginning to think that tiredness has more to do with the little amount of time that I get to myself. Most days their naps end up staggered and so that leaves me with about an hour to myself at night before I head to bed. That hour is very precious to me.
So that brings me to tonight. I got a babysitter because tonight was the MOPS (Mothers of preschoolers) open house and I had thought it would be a good idea to join. Everyone says that it's good to commiserate with other Moms', right? This group meets in once a month in the evenings and then I think they also organize some playgroups. As this afternoon hit and let's just say that someone must have THROWN herself off the wrong side of the bed after her nap and was determined to make it known to the rest of the people in this house, I started to dread an evening surrounded by moms talking about their perky little children. All of a sudden the idea of me joining MOPS just sounded ludicrous to me. If there is one thing I know about myself it's that when I'm stressed, my true introverted side of me comes out and I just need to be by myself to recoup. So when Erin showed up to babysit I told her I was heading to Borders bookstore for the evening.
Ahhhh.
It's like getting a brain massage.
Here's the frosting of my evening; I'm walking through the aisles, still feeling pretty sorry for myself, which then annoys me that I have such a bad attitude so I start asking God to help me and to strengthen me. Literally two seconds after my quick prayer, my eye catches the name of my most beloved author, Corrie Ten Boom. If you've never read her book "The Hiding Place," please do. It's an amazing story of her survival during WWII after her family was arrested for hiding Jews and then the life she led after she was released. Just seeing her name brought tears to my eyes because the way she lived her life and just gave all of herself to God has inspired me more than I can describe since I first read "The Hiding Place" in junior high. Next to that book I saw her name with a title I'd never heard before, "I Stand At The Door And Knock." It's a book with forty never-before-published devotions that she wrote. This book was just published this year even though she died in 1983. I can't even tell you what this is for me except that there are tears running down my face right now. I feel like tonight God stepped in and did something for me that Brent would have done if he were here. It's almost like He said "Oh, she could use some cheering up. Let's show her this book, it will make her happy." It wouldn't have surprised me if I had found a bow on it! There is so much in this world that I don't know, or understand, or can begin to comprehend but what I know for certain is that God loves so completely and tenderly--we have all but to ask and He's there to show us how great He loves.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
A Pat From Me to You
Where I grew up in the north country, people are...shall we say...reserved. It is best to not show too much emotion lest the neighbors fear the cold has truly gotten to you and you end up at the next high school hockey game sitting by yourself...
alone...
stuck to your frozen chair...
just little ol' you sitting all lonely in your neon green Artic Cat coat and those pants called "russels" that, seriously people, went out of style 20 years ago. All this because at the last game you decided to get frisky and give a round of hugs when the Prowlers scored a goal. Hugging? What were you thinking?
No, up north we have what is called the "pat." It's a one handed staccato like tap on the back and it is performed when saying "hello" or "goodbye," in consoling someone or in celebratory fashion. It is also the most acceptable public display of affection. You can show emotion on your face but be careful to not overdo it, you might scare the person. You are also allowed to vary the tempo of the pat to your own liking. When Brent first met my parents it did not take long for him to catch on to our sacred tradition of the pat and he is now able to understand the true love that is shown to him every time we visit. He is, unfortunately, still a little too exuberant in his patting technique.
Imagine my glee when this week while carrying Clare around she started giving me a pat. It started out as just a couple on my arm but today it was continuous patting on my shoulder almost every time I held her. She had just the right amount of expression too, I could fully understand the meaning of her pat as if she was saying, "I love you Mom and I really appreciate all the diapers you've changed and the hours we've spent together during milk time. Thank you too for the pureed food. Those peaches you made were something else." Oh thank you Lord that you've put some good Norwegian understanding in that head of hers!
alone...
stuck to your frozen chair...
just little ol' you sitting all lonely in your neon green Artic Cat coat and those pants called "russels" that, seriously people, went out of style 20 years ago. All this because at the last game you decided to get frisky and give a round of hugs when the Prowlers scored a goal. Hugging? What were you thinking?
No, up north we have what is called the "pat." It's a one handed staccato like tap on the back and it is performed when saying "hello" or "goodbye," in consoling someone or in celebratory fashion. It is also the most acceptable public display of affection. You can show emotion on your face but be careful to not overdo it, you might scare the person. You are also allowed to vary the tempo of the pat to your own liking. When Brent first met my parents it did not take long for him to catch on to our sacred tradition of the pat and he is now able to understand the true love that is shown to him every time we visit. He is, unfortunately, still a little too exuberant in his patting technique.
Imagine my glee when this week while carrying Clare around she started giving me a pat. It started out as just a couple on my arm but today it was continuous patting on my shoulder almost every time I held her. She had just the right amount of expression too, I could fully understand the meaning of her pat as if she was saying, "I love you Mom and I really appreciate all the diapers you've changed and the hours we've spent together during milk time. Thank you too for the pureed food. Those peaches you made were something else." Oh thank you Lord that you've put some good Norwegian understanding in that head of hers!
Friday, August 22, 2008
My Little Bird
I just had to show you this. My little Clare is little indeed. She'll be seven months next week and right now she weighs just over 14 lbs. However, don't think for one minute that she's not a good eater. No siree! This is the pose I get before I can even get the spoon back in the bowl to refill it. I thought you might get a kick out of it.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Out and About
The girls and I have been couped up in the house a lot the last few days and this afternoon the effects were starting to take a toll on us. I knew it was time to get out when I started quoting lines from Sage's book Bad Dog Marley like, "I can't take it anymore!" So I took Sage and Clare to a peaceful place where you can sit on rocks and watch as water trickles down into a quiet pond. Oh the peace that flowed over me as we stood there in front of the water, with Pottery Barn on my right and White House Black Market just down the hall. Whoever came up with putting a pond in the middle of this mall was a genius. You can totally trick your kid into thinking this is a fun field trip for them but really this is about you getting away from the toys that seem to multiply on their own, the messes that never go away and the Easter in the Garden book that was so poorly written but you have to keep reading it out of fear that saying no might turn your child away from reading for the REST OF THEIR LIVES!
Sorry about that, I only had one cup of coffee today.
Let me just clarify one thing: I'm not a big spender. I can spend hours going from store to store and not buy one thing and be completely content with the experience. For me, I think it's more about just looking at something fresh and new--along with the possibility of finding something utterly wonderful at such a great discount and getting to tell Brent how much money I saved so that he should have to practically thank me for buying it.
One note I have to make, on the way in I noticed some construction for a new store going on and when I looked to see what store it would be, it literally took my breath away. Anthropologie.
YEAAAAA! (Brent just read this and is right now saying "Oh no!") This is my favorite store ever and it's now coming to Omaha. I can hardly contain myself!
Okay, back to our day. So after the mall we headed across the road to what I believe is an oasis in the pesticide ridden, bland produce we eat these days, Whole Foods. The food is so wonderful there that it actually makes me feel giddy just to look at it. It seems to also have the same affect on Sage and Clare as well. Sage ate tons of broccoli exclaiming "this is so delicious!" and Clare was smiling and bouncing around as happy as could be...oh wait, she's always like that. Well anyway, after we had our dinner there we headed to the produce section so I could get some fruits and veggies to puree for Clare. Sage saw a stack of nectarines and took off running to them yelling "I love apples!" I wasn't planning on getting any "apples" so I kept going but when I turned around to call for Sage I saw something that has put a resolve in me to get her out more. The girl was licking the nectarines. That's right, tongue sticking out, going from one to the next, in between saying "Mmm, I LOVE apples." Mortified, I ran back and quickly got her to stop, telling her that licking nectarines...I mean apples...oh whatever, is NOT something we do in public. Then I tried to bag up as many wet nectarines that I could find.
I probably just taught her that if she wants something at the store all she has to do is lick it up real good.
Sorry about that, I only had one cup of coffee today.
Let me just clarify one thing: I'm not a big spender. I can spend hours going from store to store and not buy one thing and be completely content with the experience. For me, I think it's more about just looking at something fresh and new--along with the possibility of finding something utterly wonderful at such a great discount and getting to tell Brent how much money I saved so that he should have to practically thank me for buying it.
One note I have to make, on the way in I noticed some construction for a new store going on and when I looked to see what store it would be, it literally took my breath away. Anthropologie.
YEAAAAA! (Brent just read this and is right now saying "Oh no!") This is my favorite store ever and it's now coming to Omaha. I can hardly contain myself!
Okay, back to our day. So after the mall we headed across the road to what I believe is an oasis in the pesticide ridden, bland produce we eat these days, Whole Foods. The food is so wonderful there that it actually makes me feel giddy just to look at it. It seems to also have the same affect on Sage and Clare as well. Sage ate tons of broccoli exclaiming "this is so delicious!" and Clare was smiling and bouncing around as happy as could be...oh wait, she's always like that. Well anyway, after we had our dinner there we headed to the produce section so I could get some fruits and veggies to puree for Clare. Sage saw a stack of nectarines and took off running to them yelling "I love apples!" I wasn't planning on getting any "apples" so I kept going but when I turned around to call for Sage I saw something that has put a resolve in me to get her out more. The girl was licking the nectarines. That's right, tongue sticking out, going from one to the next, in between saying "Mmm, I LOVE apples." Mortified, I ran back and quickly got her to stop, telling her that licking nectarines...I mean apples...oh whatever, is NOT something we do in public. Then I tried to bag up as many wet nectarines that I could find.
I probably just taught her that if she wants something at the store all she has to do is lick it up real good.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
"I feel the need, the need for speed." (name that movie)
After surviving the countertop episode (yes, I did finally get my faucet hooked up), I have been enjoying the cool beauty of my new kitchen while I listen to the soft buzzing...no, make that a loud buzzing...no, make that a sonic boom of yet another fighter jet flying over our house. Oh joy, it's once again the annual Airforce Airshow. Now, I know there are some of you enthusiasts that would be thrilled to be here watching plane after plane, all day long, dawn until dusk but I must admit I'm growing a bit tired of it.
there are small, fast planes,
I'm talking plane...
after plane...
AFTER AIRPLANE!!
While some of us have important work to get done,
there are small, fast planes,
big, fast planes
even multiple fast planes zipping by.
While there are those who certainly enjoy the thrill, others just don't have time for such silliness.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
This is Nuts!
A month ago Brent and I decided to put in granite counter tops (yea!) and the earliest they could get them installed was going to be August 6th. During that time they came out for estimates and then to measure and the counters had to be completely bare so we tossed everything onto the dining room table and leave it all there figuring it would have to get moved again anyway. August 6th is approaching and Premiere Countertops (the company installing our much anticipated counter tops) calls and says they are running behind and could they reschedule for the 7th? Ya, sure a betcha, no problem. Mom will be visiting, won't that be fun to show her...until they call the week of and tell me they are still running behind and could they reschedule for Monday afternoon. Grrr, I guess Mom will have to wait. Monday afternoon arrives my counter tops are bare, cabinets empty, drawers pulled out and I'm herding Sage away from what she believes to be the best kitchen playset ever made available when they call Brent in North Carolina (why they called him I'm not sure) and guess what...that's right, can you believe they are still behind? At this point Brent rails into them about the inconvenience they have been (go get 'em tiger!) and how dare they do this to a woman who is at home with a toddler and a baby while her husband is deployed (at-a-boy!). So when they call me with their tails tucked between their legs, we decide on Wednesday at 9am.
Here's is how today went and I'm not kidding you, this all really happened:
8:00am--two kind gentlemen (whom I will now refer to as tall guy and short guy) show up an hour before we had agreed upon but because my girls are still faithfully getting up at the crack of dawn, I'm properly dressed and I've finished nursing. Whew! Then I realized that the kitchen drawers need to get pulled out which after I tell them it will take me a minute, they had the audacity to give me an annoyed look! But because I had been through the drill a number of times before, I was able to finish the task in a new Olympic record time of 56.021 seconds and before they came back in with all their equipment. MmHmm...that's right, you can just put that annoyed look right back into your tool box.
9:11am--Old counter tops are out, and in preservation in the garage to be transferred to the duck shack next fall. New ones coming in. Yippee!
9:34am--Call plumber to firm up a time for them to come and hook up the faucet and garbage disposal. I get connected with Lisa in plumbing and enjoy a friendly business chat with her. She must sense my giddiness over the excitement of the day.
9:43am--Get a shout from tall guy, "Hey miss, can I show you something?" That's never a good question. Go upstairs and outside with them where short guy is standing with a sorry look on his face and I may be wrong but possibly some fear too. They show me that when they were taking the clamps off a piece of granite the size of a marble chipped off. There are four counter top pieces total and which one do you think got chipped...of course the one with the sink. Here's the stinker, we do not have shut off valves for the faucet and therefore the entire water supply to the house had to be shut off. They tell me they can get a new slab cut and in by tomorrow but in my head I'm seeing a picture of a two year old and a sixth month old and all I can think is, "no water...No Water....NO WATER!!!"
9:52am--Sage appears from coloring (much to the amusement of tall guy and short guy) with a green mustache and arms that Rainbow Bright would have been proud of. Thankfully they are washable and I use a container of wipes to clean her up.
9:58am--Call the plumbing people and once again get Lisa to whom I blabber on and on about no water to and bless her, she somehow understands what I'm trying to convey to her and arranges the plumber to come to our house to install shut off valves instead.
10:40am--Tall guy and short guy finish the slabs that haven't broke and short guy, still looking quite sorry, blubbers something about being afraid of what the owner will say.
11:30am--Of course, the one time Sage would ask for water with her lunch would be today.
11:56am--Dishwasher topples forward and narrowly misses Sage due to not being attached to a counter.
1:18pm--Countertop owner calls and says they have dropped everything to get our slab cut and installed today. Good grief Brent, what did you say to them?
1:21pm--Call the plumber people, talk to my new best friend Lisa and tell her to put a halt to the plans and arrange to have them come at 4:30pm to install the faucet and garbage disposal.
1:48pm--Sage woke up from her nap and had a huge accident, completely soaking her favorite blanket and sheets. Deep breaths...it's okay, I'll wash them tonight before she goes to bed.
2:22pm--For once I'm happy this house has four bathrooms.
3:45pm--Tall guy and short guy are back with the new counter top and get installed in less than an hour. Yea!
4:19pm--Sage is asking for water again. I also just found what I thought was an abnormal skin tag on Clare's face but then realized it was just caked on baby cereal.
5:10pm--Plumber guy shows up and as we walk over to the sink he says "Oh, they didn't tell me I was hooking up a faucet and disposal. I just thought I was fixing a garbage disposal." Lisa, WE'RE THROUGH! At this point his sources for getting the parts he needs are closed so he ends up installing shut off valves. We go over the estimate for the hook ups and it's clear that if I go buy some parts myself, we can save a good deal of money. So we agree for him to come over in the morning to set it up.
6:10pm--After supper and enjoying the wonderful feeling of getting to wipe my kids faces clean, we head to Menards. Great, there's an accident, I'm stuck in traffic. I'm not kidding you there were two police cars, three ambulances and one fire truck at the scene.
7:00pm--Get back from Menards and start getting the kids ready for bed upon which I realize Sage's blanket and sheets have not been washed. I quickly put different sheets on her bed and when I tucked her in I put a different blanket on her and shoved her gross blanket to the end of the bed. Thankfully she didn't catch on.
7:49pm--Countertop owner guy calls to make sure I'm pleased with how they went out of their way to get the counter installed today. Seriously?!
I documented the progress today. No, there isn't a backsplash right now but I'm working on it.
I know this is a grainy picture but I was getting too much reflection with a flash. This is what they finished.
This is what wasn't finished
Semi-finished.
Can you tell what's missing?
Here's is how today went and I'm not kidding you, this all really happened:
8:00am--two kind gentlemen (whom I will now refer to as tall guy and short guy) show up an hour before we had agreed upon but because my girls are still faithfully getting up at the crack of dawn, I'm properly dressed and I've finished nursing. Whew! Then I realized that the kitchen drawers need to get pulled out which after I tell them it will take me a minute, they had the audacity to give me an annoyed look! But because I had been through the drill a number of times before, I was able to finish the task in a new Olympic record time of 56.021 seconds and before they came back in with all their equipment. MmHmm...that's right, you can just put that annoyed look right back into your tool box.
9:11am--Old counter tops are out, and in preservation in the garage to be transferred to the duck shack next fall. New ones coming in. Yippee!
9:34am--Call plumber to firm up a time for them to come and hook up the faucet and garbage disposal. I get connected with Lisa in plumbing and enjoy a friendly business chat with her. She must sense my giddiness over the excitement of the day.
9:43am--Get a shout from tall guy, "Hey miss, can I show you something?" That's never a good question. Go upstairs and outside with them where short guy is standing with a sorry look on his face and I may be wrong but possibly some fear too. They show me that when they were taking the clamps off a piece of granite the size of a marble chipped off. There are four counter top pieces total and which one do you think got chipped...of course the one with the sink. Here's the stinker, we do not have shut off valves for the faucet and therefore the entire water supply to the house had to be shut off. They tell me they can get a new slab cut and in by tomorrow but in my head I'm seeing a picture of a two year old and a sixth month old and all I can think is, "no water...No Water....NO WATER!!!"
9:52am--Sage appears from coloring (much to the amusement of tall guy and short guy) with a green mustache and arms that Rainbow Bright would have been proud of. Thankfully they are washable and I use a container of wipes to clean her up.
9:58am--Call the plumbing people and once again get Lisa to whom I blabber on and on about no water to and bless her, she somehow understands what I'm trying to convey to her and arranges the plumber to come to our house to install shut off valves instead.
10:40am--Tall guy and short guy finish the slabs that haven't broke and short guy, still looking quite sorry, blubbers something about being afraid of what the owner will say.
11:30am--Of course, the one time Sage would ask for water with her lunch would be today.
11:56am--Dishwasher topples forward and narrowly misses Sage due to not being attached to a counter.
1:18pm--Countertop owner calls and says they have dropped everything to get our slab cut and installed today. Good grief Brent, what did you say to them?
1:21pm--Call the plumber people, talk to my new best friend Lisa and tell her to put a halt to the plans and arrange to have them come at 4:30pm to install the faucet and garbage disposal.
1:48pm--Sage woke up from her nap and had a huge accident, completely soaking her favorite blanket and sheets. Deep breaths...it's okay, I'll wash them tonight before she goes to bed.
2:22pm--For once I'm happy this house has four bathrooms.
3:45pm--Tall guy and short guy are back with the new counter top and get installed in less than an hour. Yea!
4:19pm--Sage is asking for water again. I also just found what I thought was an abnormal skin tag on Clare's face but then realized it was just caked on baby cereal.
5:10pm--Plumber guy shows up and as we walk over to the sink he says "Oh, they didn't tell me I was hooking up a faucet and disposal. I just thought I was fixing a garbage disposal." Lisa, WE'RE THROUGH! At this point his sources for getting the parts he needs are closed so he ends up installing shut off valves. We go over the estimate for the hook ups and it's clear that if I go buy some parts myself, we can save a good deal of money. So we agree for him to come over in the morning to set it up.
6:10pm--After supper and enjoying the wonderful feeling of getting to wipe my kids faces clean, we head to Menards. Great, there's an accident, I'm stuck in traffic. I'm not kidding you there were two police cars, three ambulances and one fire truck at the scene.
7:00pm--Get back from Menards and start getting the kids ready for bed upon which I realize Sage's blanket and sheets have not been washed. I quickly put different sheets on her bed and when I tucked her in I put a different blanket on her and shoved her gross blanket to the end of the bed. Thankfully she didn't catch on.
7:49pm--Countertop owner guy calls to make sure I'm pleased with how they went out of their way to get the counter installed today. Seriously?!
I documented the progress today. No, there isn't a backsplash right now but I'm working on it.
I know this is a grainy picture but I was getting too much reflection with a flash. This is what they finished.
This is what wasn't finished
Semi-finished.
Can you tell what's missing?
Sunday, August 10, 2008
She Did It!
She made it down the aisle! I wish so badly that I could have watched her but I was busy playing some music for her to walk to. From what my Mom said, (thanks again Mom, things would not have gone so great if you hadn't been there) she started out and then Mom took off to go meet her up front but Sage kinda stalled until a very kind usher walked with her a little ways and then let her go on her own. About a third of the way to go she stopped and realized she was completely on her own so she squeezed her eyes as closed until she could only see out very small slits and went the rest of the way down the aisle as if thinking "if I close my eyes nobody will see me." Nana was there to greet her and then I joined them to sit during the ceremony while Sage enjoyed her jelly belly beans she had been promised as a reward.
Oh my little Sage, I was so proud of you today. You are wonderful just the way you are--a tough little girl who will brave it out and be herself no matter what. Thank you for singing your little songs while I played after the ceremony, your sweet La, La's are the most beautiful melodies I've ever heard.
It was a beautiful day with a beautiful bride and groom but what I will treasure in my heart is the memory of my little flower princess dancing barefoot to her own song.
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